The original bouquet
I never got around to posting this when it happened, but after coming across the photos still sitting on my desktop thought it was worth sharing. I decided to order myself some flowers after I'd had a minor tiff with John because well, don't we always deserve flowers after a small fight? Being the practical sort I figured it was probably easier if I just ordered them myself, so I found a good deal on ProFlowers.com and waited for them to arrive. Surprisingly they never came on the expected delivery date, which was odd since I had been home all day. I checked the UPS tracking number and was surprised to see that "Owner not home, package required signature" had been entered as the reason why. Surprised especially because a) I was home, b) no signature was required and c) no "Sorry we missed you" post-it note was left on my door, mailbox or entryway. Clearly the driver just got lost and decided f-it, it's Miller Time and left the package for the next guy. I contacted ProFlowers right away and let them know, and they were surprisingly helpful and accomodating. They ended up offering me a replacement arrangement of equal value, and I took them up on it and ordered a more expensive Lavender Wreath, offering to pay the difference. Woo-hoo, they comped me the whole wreath! I was pretty excited, especially as the original arrangement did arrive the following day in not too-terrible shape. Unfortunately, when the wreath arrived it looked like it had been sat on. Naturally when it was delivered the driver rang the bell and ran away, and as I was in the bathroom at the time, he was gone by the time I got to the front door. Grrr... half the lavender buds had been knocked off the wreath. Some might think that this was the end of the story, but no. I did send pictures of the smushed box to ProFlowers not to get anything else from them but just to let them know what a rotten job UPS was doing of delivering their product. So naturally what happened on the following day was a package left at my house for a neighbor with a totally different street address (ok same number but totally different street name). I managed to get ahold of one of the managers in the Elmsford office and explain to her that her company was inspiring a dangerously low level of confidence in me and that one more f-up and I would be tempted to write all kinds of threatening letters. Lo and behold they managed to find the driver who dropped that package off to come pick it up again and redeliver it. He gave me some song and dance about how this was a training route for new drivers and that it must have been someone else that messed up all the flower orders but I could tell it was him. He was enough of an old-timer to have had the time to sit in the driver's seat all day concocting excuses for why his packages were late/lost/smushed. It did make me wonder if I shouldn't consider not shopping for Christmas presents on the internet this year for once.
The box the wreath was shipped in. Clearly someone needed a booster seat to reach the steering wheel and thought the one marked "Fragile" would make a good choice.
Frankie is wreathed in lavender
